What Are You Indicating?

HIGHLIGHT

Not too long ago, my wife and I dropped our son off at school and were rushing to another appointment. As I hurried down the road, I approached a junction with no intention of letting the waiting truck exit in front of me. But just as I got close enough to risk a collision, the driver suddenly pulled out, forcing me to slam on the brakes.

If you’ve ever driven in Barbados, you’d know this kind of move is expected. What I didn’t expect was the driver’s reaction. He stuck his hands out the window, screaming profanities at me like I had done something wrong! I was flabbergasted, venting to my wife in the passenger seat, who nodded in agreement.

That’s when, about 10 meters down the road, Lynda interrupted my frustration and said, “Dario, you know your indicator is on?”

Immediately, it clicked. The man’s response—though still wrong—suddenly made sense. My indicator had been signalling that I intended to turn into the corner, giving him room to pull out, even though I had no such intention. I had unknowingly sent the wrong message.

That moment stuck with me for the rest of the day. I began reflecting on other areas of my life where I might be "driving with my indicator on"—signalling one thing while doing another.

I share this story because I know how guilty I’ve been of signalling intentions that I didn’t follow through on—especially in January. It’s so easy to talk a good game, to set lofty resolutions, only to fall short when it’s time to act.

That’s why it is essential to make a conscious decision to be intentional about ensuring my actions align with my words. I want my walk to match my talk. If I indicate that I’m going to do something, I’m committed to following through.

INSIGHT

In my effort to achieve greater consistency, I had to take a hard look at why I sometimes fail to follow through on my intentions. That’s when I came across the 5 Emotional Stages of Change framework:

1. Uninformed Optimism – You start with excitement and energy, full of hope and enthusiasm, unaware of the challenges ahead.

2. Informed Pessimism – Reality sets in. The effort and obstacles become clear, and your initial optimism starts to wane.

3. The Valley of Despair – This is the toughest stage, where quitting feels most tempting. The weight of difficulty often overshadows the vision that started the journey.

4. Informed Optimism – If you push through the valley, you begin to see progress. The challenges are still present, but you now have the confidence and insight to overcome them.

5. Completion – You reach your goal, feeling a sense of accomplishment and clarity, recognizing that the struggle was worth it.

I realized I often started in uninformed optimism, full of excitement but unaware of what it truly takes to achieve something meaningful. Then, in informed pessimism, the reality check would hit, and by the time I reached the valley of despair, I would quit. I was unknowingly stuck in a loop between stages 1 and 3, never pushing through to see the reward of stage 4.

What I learned is that the difference between failure and follow-through is how we handle the valley. Success doesn’t come from avoiding the discomfort—it comes from enduring it and continuing forward.

I’m committing to breaking the cycle on the things that matter. When I hit the valley, I’ll remind myself that it’s part of the process. On the other side of difficulty is success, but only if I keep going.

IGNITE

The 5 Emotional Stages of Change framework isn’t just a roadmap for understanding why we quit—it’s a tool for building resilience and pushing through to success. The key lies in how we prepare for and navigate the most challenging stage: the valley of despair.

Here’s the truth: the valley isn’t a sign of failure; it’s a sign of progress. It’s the point where your commitment is tested and where growth happens. But to push through, you must prepare yourself intentionally.

As you move toward your goals this year, ask yourself: Am I ready for the valley? Are you willing to endure discomfort to get to where you want to be?

Take the time now to build your foundation:

• Clarify your "why." Your purpose is the anchor that keeps you grounded when the excitement fades.

• Count the cost. Expect the valley—it’s a natural part of the journey.

• Create a support system. Surround yourself with people who will encourage and hold you accountable.

• Commit to action. Focus on the next step rather than the entire mountain, and celebrate small wins along the way.

The valley isn’t where the story ends; it’s where true transformation begins. This year, let’s commit not just to start strong but to finish well. You’ve got what it takes to push through—just don’t stop in the valley.